I still can't believe that 2004 is coming to an end in a few days. This year has been the fastest in my life. Even now I feel that just last week, I stayed in Dinesh/Sharanya's house in Bukit Batok. I feel as if I'd just woken up from my coma to realise that I had been sleeping for 9 months.

Let's take stock now. There are some significant and some insignificant events in this year. Significant, I had quit smoking, I had made my car and myself street legal, I had signed up for a PG course in Journalism that's into mid-term exam now.

I've learned a lot of things this year, just as I did in the previous years of my life. I've watched lot of movies. I've read a lot of books. Significantly 'Who will cry when you die' by Robin Sharma. I made friends with Devika, I regained my contact with Sam and Viji. I stood by Latha's side during her difficult times. I have become more honest, truthful and conscientious with my affairs. I've spent all my money and energy on curing my dad's carcinoma aesophegus. I've spent rest of my savings on getting my car in order.

Otherwise I fell ill several times, had visited doctor like never before and lost lot of money.

Most importantly I've had an awakening on my career choices and made some concrete decisions. I've decided that next year is going to be quite significant in my life. I'm going to do two things. 1) Get into the media and 2) Get married.

Which media and whom is the only question that remains to be answered.

Swades

Cast: Shah Rukh Khan, Gayathri Joshi; Music: A R Rahman; Direction: Ashutosh Govarikar (for those who wonder, he made Lagaan, the only Indian movie to ever get an Oscar nomination)

The movie Swades. I really wonder why many haven't liked it. I can say I didn't like it because it is lengthy, it shows that only the hero can solve problems, it shows a village sans caste issues, poverty, feudal structures, etc.

But others who didn't like it, what is their reason? Because it's preachy? Because it deals with real issues? Because it conveys strong messages?

Swades is quite unbollywood in many ways. It show two Indias that are totally unrelated and live different lives. It shows the typical conflict when a member of second India collides with the first one. Bollywood rarely deals with such tricky issues. It isn't surprising that Gowarikar has chosen such subject. But the only unpredictability of this film is that Gowarikar's Mohan Bhargava doesn't transform the village the way Kamal does in the fantasy flick Unnal Mudiyum Thambi. Mohan simply gets involved in its affairs the way an outsider who knows better things does. And there's a strong reason for Mohan to do so; Gita. While attempting to save Gita's aspersions, Mohan slowly (but firmly) involves himself in the happenings of the place. And in a Budda like awakening in his encounter with a Below-Poverty-Line farmer family, Mohan begins to question the value system that the place cherishes.

One good thing about Swades is they are not finite characters, just as there aren't any in real life. For instance, that awakening doesn't transform Mohan into dedicating himself to the village cause. He still reels under the dilemma of what he should do next. He oscilates between his love for the woman and his commitments back in Nasa. His return to motherland is still questionable as one may wonder whether he returns for his country or for his girl (She refuses to relocate to US). And it is not portrayed as if Mohan is back to do some social reengineering. He is busy wresling with the postmaster and flirting with his fiancee. Nothing dramatic takes place. Ever. The most dramatic sequence in the movie is when the hydraulic power plant is commissioned. I heard some comment that it's a bit weird for a Nasa scientist to setup a mini hydraulic plant. Never mind. The village doesn't require a satelite. While one world struggles to place precipitation satellites into orbit, another celebrates its achivement of having installed an hydraulic power plant. Gowarikar could never have brought in such an ironcy in a more subtle way.

As anybody else would do, comparison with Lagaan is inevitable. While Lagaan has captured the vivid imaginations of the nation (and to a great extent, academy hopes), Swades may not live up to their expectations. As a matter of fact, nothing that Govarikar does will. He may have to live the Lagaan curse for the rest of his life. Like Orsen Wells did with Citizen Kane or Zemeckis does with Forrest Gump, and Milos Forman or several others.

As much as possible, I want to resist the temptation to compare. I'll appreciate the reviewers if they can measure Swades on its own merit. Swades has songs, dance, love, emotions, patriotism, heroism and big names A R Rahman and Shah Rukh Khan. Despite all that, this movie manages as much realism as possible while raising some essential questions and partly trying to answer them. That's the success of Gowarikar.

If at all I have any grouse against him, I would want to request him one thing: Sir, can you tell your next story in two hours flat please?

Everytime I begin to write something, someone comes and distracts me into something else. Does that mean I'm not interested in writing?